How I Stopped Donating to Google and Started Actually Making Money With Ads

You know that sinking feeling when you check your Google Ads dashboard and realize you just spent another $500—and got maybe one lead that ghosted you faster than a bad Tinder date?

Yeah. Been there. Deeply been there.

I used to joke that my Google Ads account was like a Vegas slot machine: I kept feeding it money and hoping for magic. Spoiler: magic didn’t happen. But here’s the thing—I eventually figured out how to stop bleeding cash and actually start making real money from those little text ads we all pretend to understand. And if I, a self-proclaimed techno-moron with a mild caffeine addiction and a short attention span, can do it… so can you.

So grab your overpriced matcha (or tequila, no judgment), and let me walk you through how I turned my Google Ads from a sad science experiment into a revenue-generating machine.

Phase 1: Denial — AKA “It’s Fine, It’s Just a Branding Expense”

Let me take you back to my rookie year as a solo coach/consultant (pick your poison—this applies across the board). I had no clue what I was doing, but I had heard that you should “invest in ads” because that’s what serious businesses do, right?

So I did. I set up some campaigns using what can only be described as pure guesswork and vibes. I targeted keywords like “business coach,” “fitness program,” and “aesthetic clinic near me” (depending on the business I was imagining myself being that week).

Let’s be honest—I was basically just funding Google’s employee happy hours.

At the time, I’d see $30/day draining out of my account and think, This is fine. It’s building brand awareness. Maybe someone will see my name and remember me later… somehow?

But the truth? No one remembered me. My phone didn’t ring. My inbox stayed quieter than my dating app on a Tuesday night. It was embarrassing. But I didn’t stop. Oh no. I doubled down. Because stubbornness is a love language.

Phase 2: Rage — AKA “Why Is Karen Getting Clients and I’m Getting Crickets?!”

One day, I was chatting with another coach—we’ll call her Karen (not that kind of Karen, I promise). She casually mentioned she was getting five to seven leads a week from Google Ads, and I just about choked on my green smoothie.

“Wait, real leads?” I asked. “Like… humans?”

“Yeah,” she said. “It’s all about your conversion funnel.”

Ah, yes. The dreaded funnel. The thing I thought I had, but really just looked like this:

Ad → Homepage → Confused Visitor → Bounce

Turns out, sending people straight to your homepage is like inviting someone to your house and yelling “Figure it out!” from another room.

I started asking more questions. What keywords was she targeting? What did her landing page look like? What kind of copy did she use? And the more we talked, the more I realized I wasn’t actually doing Google Ads—I was just… burning money and calling it marketing.

Phase 3: Reality Check — “Okay Google, Teach Me How to Not Suck”

I swallowed my pride and decided to learn how to really use Google Ads. Not the surface-level stuff. I’m talking keyword match types, quality scores, retargeting, the whole nerd buffet.

And here’s where things started to shift.

Lesson #1: Keywords Are Not Just Vibes

At first, I was bidding on broad keywords like “coaching” or “lawyer.” That’s like yelling “Hey!” in a crowded stadium and hoping the right person turns around.

Instead, I learned to go super specific. Think:

• “Business coach for new entrepreneurs in Austin”
• “Non-surgical facelift near Beverly Hills”
• “Real estate agent for first-time buyers Bakersfield”

I started using phrase match and exact match keywords—no more casting a wide net and catching every confused intern Googling job descriptions.

Lesson #2: Landing Pages Matter. A Lot.

If your landing page looks like a resume or your homepage, you’re doing it wrong. Your landing page should speak directly to the pain point of the person searching—and offer a clear, low-friction next step.

I created simple, focused landing pages:

• One headline
• One clear offer (free consult, discounted session, quick guide)
• One call to action

It made a difference almost immediately.

Phase 4: Experimentation — “Let’s Nerd Out (But Make It Sexy)”

I started treating my ad account like a lab.

A/B Testing Headlines Like a Mad Scientist

I ran three versions of each ad, changing just one thing at a time:

• Headline A: “Struggling with low client bookings?”
• Headline B: “Get 5 New Clients This Week — Guaranteed”
• Headline C: “Free Consult for Austin-Based Coaches”

Guess what? B performed 3x better. Why? Because it was specific, bold, and offered a tangible benefit. People don’t want fluffy—they want results.

Heatmaps Changed My Life

Ever used Hotjar or Crazy Egg? You should. These tools show where people click (or don’t) on your landing page. I realized that most people weren’t even scrolling to the bottom, so I moved my CTA to the top. Boom—conversion rate doubled.

Retargeting = The Best Kind of Creepy

Let’s be real—retargeting ads are kind of stalkerish. But also? Super effective.

I set up a campaign to follow people who visited my landing page but didn’t book. A week later, they’d see my face again on YouTube or a partner site with a message like:

“Still thinking about taking your business to the next level? Spots are filling up fast!”

You’d be surprised how many people convert on the second or third touch. Sometimes folks just need a little nudge.

Phase 5: Profit — “Wait, This Actually Works?”

Fast-forward six months, and here’s what changed:

• My ad spend stayed about the same ($30–$50/day)
• My cost per lead dropped from $78 to $12.44
• My monthly revenue jumped by 2.3x (and my profit margins actually smiled at me for once)

But the biggest shift? Confidence. I wasn’t throwing spaghetti at the wall anymore. I knew how to engineer results. And that meant I could scale, delegate, or even teach others how to do the same.

So What’s the TL;DR?

If you’re running Google Ads and not seeing results, it’s not that Google doesn’t work. It’s that you might be missing a few key pieces:

1. Specific keywords that match buyer intent
2. Clean, focused landing pages with social proof
3. Testing and tracking to make smart decisions
4. Retargeting to seal the deal
5. Patience + grit, because this stuff does take time

You can stop donating to Google and start actually making money from your ads. But you’ve gotta get intentional about your strategy—and be willing to tweak, learn, and stay curious.

You Deserve One

Listen, I know this stuff can feel overwhelming—especially if you’re a one-person show wearing all the hats (and somehow also answering emails at 11 PM in your pajamas). But you’re not alone. And you don’t have to be a marketing genius to make this work.

You just have to start. Be willing to experiment. Stay scrappy. And remember that done is better than perfect.

Now go forth and make those Google Ads work.

And hey—if you ever need a second pair of eyes on your landing page or just wanna vent about your latest “what-the-heck-is-CTR” moment, you know where to find me.